Tuesday, December 20, 2005

epiphanies from the days

ang ganda ng night sky. went out just awhile ago. if only you could keep it in a snapshot, forever embedded in one's memory. when you're feeling down, you'll just have to look up and lo and behold, the wonders of the cosmic vastness. wala lang, ang ganda lang talaga kasi.
***

did i say that i was stoned on the night of the lantern parade? we were supposed to watch the umc concert but then, my companions didn't really want to watch. they just wanted to hang out, and with only four of us remaining, it woudn't really be much fun. we were talking about things we wanted to do. i broached the subject of having a good time with some gin. and there we were, formulating a plan. minutes later, we were off to board a jeep that would pass through east ave. so that we could buy some at 7-11, near jo's and ace's house in maaralin st. franco, a subol applicant and binong's (mr. promil kid - galing magpiano nyan!) older brother, was particularly excited about it, especially with the thought that we'll be drinking gsm blu. haven't tasted it before. it was a first time. and it was already close to 9pm by then. he was going to be picked up by his dad by 9.30. anyway, besides all that, he's a great person. he's the only applicant i've been seeing, bearing in mind the fact that i only get to pass by the subol tambayan around 5.30 pm during tuesdays. and he was with the subolites during the lantern parade. he's really bonding with the members which is really great. and since i got to know him when we were all walking towards the shopping center for dinner, i can say he's a great person to talk to. i don't think there'll be a boring time with him. and with this new intimacy with a new person, there goes my defensive/coward attitude again. i tried to distance myself from him some moments afterwards.

now to continue with the more significant story... we had orange juice with the gsm blu, a perfect mix and then some boy bawang and munchers, a brand of green peas he strongly recommended. and i'm recommending it to you, too. sarap! we were through with the whole bottle 30 minutes later. just in time for franco's dad to come by and pick him up. i was into the 4th round at ang lakas na ng tama ko. grabe iba talaga. ang lakas! pulang-pula pa ako. mas heightened ang senses. you feel the coldness in the cold sweat of the juice container, the rubbery feel of my slippers, everything... i passed on the next round and had one during the last. i guess there was about 6-7 rounds. afterwards, i just wanted to lie. ace was still watching programs on gma while jo was already upstairs. i eventually went up to the room. both jo and i are having massive headaches and we were telling each other stuffs we don't normally talk about when sober. yeah, drunk again... tagal ko na ring di umiinom. the whole first sem, there was no opportunity for drinking. na-miss ko. pero grabe, di ko talaga kinaya iyong sakit ng ulo. di ako nakauwi. slept there. i woke up early in the morning. naumpisahan ko pang basahin iyong american gods ni kuya jeff which he hasn't read yet. interesting the book sobra. love his storytelling. hooray for neil gaiman!
***

the next day, i dropped by the tiangge at the chapel for the bilin of my bros. i wasn't able to buy everything at the tiangges at the acad oval. after a morning of trying to fix the things i'm bringing home, i had lunch and then tried my luck at looking for the tiangges at the acad oval. well, wala na nga talaga sila doon so i walked back. ayos lang iyon kasi i got to exercise for a bit before getting to the tiangges. i bought a pair of dangling earrings - a single-stranded bead column of around 4 colors - for P10. see how inexpensive trinkets and holiday presents can get? ang galing ng mga tiangge. maganda na nga, mura pa. i can say the same for greenhills. napadpad ako dun to look for something to wear to the up cinema ball. boho heaven siya... pero i only got to buy a pair of slippers like those of alessa's. hours of walking around for nothing much. pero okey kasi ang dami kong nakita mga bagong designs at styles. ang galing talaga. tiangges can be the solution to almost anything - to household equipments, uber hip clothes, school stuffs, toys, fashion accessories, etc.
***

helter skelter is a song from the beatles' white album. here's the lyrics:

when i get to the bottom, i go back to the top or the slide
where i stop and i turn and i go for a ride
till i get to the bottom and i see you again

do you, don't you want me to love you
i'm coming down fast but i'm miles above you
tell me tell me tell me come on tell me the answer
you may be a lover but you ain't no dancer

helter skelter, helter skelter
helter skelter

do you, don't you want me to love you
i'm coming down fast but i'm miles above you
tell me tell me tell me come on tell me the answer
you may be a lover but you ain't no dancer


look out helter skelter, helter skelter
helter skelter
look out, case here she comes


why this song? well, there's this movie helter skelter that i got to watch during the weekend. it's an adaptation of the real-life murders of la bianca/tate. the latter, sharon tate, is the 8-months old pregnant of wife of director roman polanski. at the forefront of these brutal killings is one man: charles manson. he is head of the family and he is regarded as jesus by the members of the family. his character was effectively portrayed. his manner, the way he speaks and most everything else about him exudes his charisma and his statements about life can really inspire people, leading them to his side. but behind all the inspiring words is a twisted mind bent on conquering the world. he says that's the message that's been given to him by the beatles through that song, as well as the entire white album, and the bible. they intend to incite violence between blacks and whites. meanwhile, the family will go into hiding in the desert. when the war starts they'll be safe there. and after there's been a winner, they're gonna emerge from the desert and defeat those who were triumphant in their initial war. and that's when they'll get to rule the world. twisted, demented, outrageously brutal. going about murdering people and then writing messages on the walls. it took months before police from different states got to connect all the murders happening in their jurisdiction. pretty explosive. and really saddening especially to the families of the murder victims, the least of which is director roman polanski. i wonder what the beatles had to say about this, particularly john lennon. i recently learned that he was alive until december 1980. and all the shooter had to say after doing the act was "I shot john lennon." there are many aspects about the guy i also learned just recently. but there, i just want to know his view regarding the white album and charles manson's claims of world domination as the message of the album.
***

ang saya siguro nung feeling na nai-express mo lahat ng nafi-feel mo on a certain moment or your views on a certain thing. hell, it would be great if you've got your mind made up over many things. hindi kasi ako ganoon. i could run out of things to say. i'm often undecided or i haven't thought things over about present situations regarding myself. hindi ako critical mag-isip. tinatamad pa akong isipin ang ilang bagay na gusto kong mahanapan ng sagot. iyong mga nadidiscover ko tungkol sa akin, usually spontaneous iyon. napapaisip, napupunta sa iba't-ibang direksyon ang utak ko at voila! epiphany. hindi conscious effort. so well, what's the point?

i finally got to watch before sunset although hindi ko siya naumpisahan. ang galing ng connection ng characters ni julie delpy and ethan hawke. after 10 years, most things haven't changed. binitin tayo dun sa prequel na before sunrise. now, involved na sila sa iba't-ibang tao. may asawa na si ethan with a kid, julie has a bf she doesn't see often. pero when they talk - actually si julie usually gumagawa nun - andun pa rin iyong connection. may spontaneity. ang galing. anything and everything ang napag-uusapan. ang cute pala nung waltz ni kinanta ni julie for ethan. the actress herself wrote and composed it. it was really cute and really nice. ang galing niya. imagine, only two characters for a two-hour movie and yet you've got their chemistry and the movie goes on, taking the viewer through the ups and downs of their emotions and the changes in their lives. and once more, binitin uli tayo. ethan may or may not have missed that flight. ang galing nung last shot. ethan smiling while julie was imitating nina simone when she performs. then she says he's gonna miss his flight. and he says he will and he smiles - a smile that beams of happiness and contentment right then and there. ang ganda. if only nagkatuluyan na sila noon pa. pero sobrang galing talaga. i love it! sino nga uli director? here's to more character-driven films and spontaneous conversations of the absurd and the mundane.
***

btw, my monitor's still horrible. the only effective color/shade here is black. and look at my blog at http://funkysoul.blogspot.com - it's orange! this is supposed to be brown.
well, it's already 10:13 am. almost an hour typing all this out. i love this release. i love to write. i love my blog. i love the people who read it and extract a little of me bit by bit of information that i give out. super galing ng technology. now, i can write better and faster. naiiwan pa rin ang ilang sinusulat ko sa aking mga naiisip pero at least, mas madali na silang habulin ngayon. hindi madalas na magasawa akong mag-type dahil fresh pa iyong mga sinusulat ko, unlike sa sulat-kamay na ang layo ng narating ng isip mo, nasa unang destinasyon pa lang ang sinusulat mo.

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